Well it started quite innocently enough with a trip to a Chinese diner. Little did I know we'd end up sampling herbal delights and giggling with a hostess with the mostess...
This charming eatery is in Clarke Quay, Singapore just down from a rather though-provoking drinking place called Clinic where the guests are served various toxic concoctions while seated in wheel chairs and hospital beds.
Our jovial hostess, Doris, was a scream from the outset and made us feel at ease and comfortable with the highly complex menu; it did help that one of our party spoke perfect Mandarin and ordered everything for us. She was even astute (for one our group allergic to sea-food) enough to ask the chef to remove the scallops from the yummy egg-white froth with scallops -- mind you, I'm not sure what else was in there apart from egg white...but he seemed to enjoy it.
Our Soon Hock (white fish for the uninitiated) was perfectly cooked, but alas, no-one wanted to brave the cheek and savour the delicate flavours of the most delicate and honoured part of the fish... What an insult to our chef...!
The desert was a mastery of chemistry. We were served small bowls filled to the brim with water and ice cubes; our interest was piqued to say the least. Then came the piping hot taro and yam which was plunged into the iced water creating streams of sugar caramel strewn over the table...the tubers were still hot inside, but the icy coating was particularly crunchy.
Finally - a discussion on penises...yes, you read me correctly - male appendages - of the animal kind I might add.
Deer dicks - to put not to-fine-a-point on it were the then the subject of the hour...how potent they are and indeed how expensive the liquor brewed from these poor animals severed sex organs. Our dear Doris (no pun intended) was obsessed with animal extensions of the male order.
We managed to escape with our lives and hymens (sic) intact to quickly head for our house for a soothing glass of champagne - which as we all know, calms the spirit and relaxes the soul.
What a night.....!
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